but still i want to run

or take a fast ride

to the sky

so i can hide

no more my reality

setting me free

from my misery

my life full of sorrow and anxiety

and feeling everything is so scary

my joy is rarely

though it does come weekly

but still scarcely

so i went on each knee

asking God seriously

please release me

from this earth

because it wasn’t worth

my mother giving birth

my children are

the only exception

but they are no longer

my protection

always feeling like a freak

but during the week
when i feel bleek
i get a call or an email
and without fail
i feel better
and can pull it together

and on Thursdays

i get excited just to meet
i always smile when we greet

so my doctor i wait to seek

and soon as we speak

our laughter out it

begins to sneak

and my happiness starts to peek

but to quickly

my sadness will heavily leak

as it is time to go

our sessions

are always fast never slow

and it’s so hard

each time to say goodbye

i want to scream and cry

only you i’ve been able

to look in the eye

and it makes me feel

i don’t want to die

only you i can relay

and for my needs

you always reply

so you motivate me

to continue and try

but i’m sorry i can’t alway comply

never wanting to disappoint you

and make you sigh

i never know what to do

because sometimes

i’m too afraid to see you